You've probably seen this before. I have. I just can't remember where or when. (Why do I feel a song coming on?)
Any way, my sweet wife, Bonnie, shared it with me so I thought I would share it with you.
A Wal-Mart store that sells husbands has just opened in Dallas, TX, where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men.
Among the instructions at the entrance, is a description of how the store operates.
There are only 6 floors. It states that the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch....
As you open the door to any floor you may choose any man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.
So, a woman goes to the Wal-Mart Husband Store to find a husband..... On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men have jobs.She continues on.
The second floor sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids.
She continues on. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking.
"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework.
"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the Sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 3,456,012 to this floor.
There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.
Thank you for shopping Wal-Mart.
I'm truely sorry, ladies. I meant no offense. Please forgive me. I'll try never to do it again. I'm usually not like this. I just couldn't help myself. O, wretched man that I am! Who has believed my report? I can't believe I stooped so low. I feel so depraved. I am a man of unclean lips. When in the course of human events. Have mercy on me! Way down yonder and not far off. Oh, de agony of de feet. A thousand pardons. Mia culpa! Mama Mia! Antidisestablishmentarianism!
Puff, puff, puff! I'm all out of breath!
11 comments:
That is good! I've never read that before:)
THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR! HOW COULD YOU SAY SUCH A THING! YOUC CAN APOLOGIZE ALL YOU WANT BUT IT WON'T HELP!
(hehehe...shhhhhhh!)
kc: Yeah, yeah, yeah. (shhhh.)
ROFLOL....LOL...Bonnie told me that you were going to use it, so I'm going to wait till next week....That is hysterical.....my ladies will go wild!!!!
Ok Joe, this one almost beats the mechanics story. he he!!
I think that says a lot about human nature in general.
God bless,
Jim
Joe,
that's the good second laugh I had today.
Leave it Wall-Mart.
Joe, that is so funny. This really gave me a good laugh, then my wife wanted to know what was so funny. (She actually is pretty easy to please, she stopped on the fifth floor!)
Of course, the name of the store could just as easily have been Neimann-Marcus.
My inner Phyllis Schlafly likes you, your story and your Antidisestablishmentarianism!
Good one, Joe. It is so, so true. If there's not one already written, how about writing it from the point of view of a man shopping Walmart for the perfect woman. Whaddya say?
women are hard to please, huh? hehe...
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